Just watch. . .
Ok, so to be completely accurate, Kari is the one who is pregnant, but I helped. 
Needless to say, we are EXTREMELY excited. We actually found out on Mother’s Day (how cool is that?), but wanted to sit on making a huge deal out of it until we had time to tell everyone in our families, and go to the doctor. We had our first doctor’s appointment yesterday, so Kari said I am now free to make a big deal out of it. 
So, without further adieu, making his/her first Internet appearance (in black and white, of course)– IT’S OUR LITTLE ZEBRA! 
Needless to say, our lives are about to change; but only for the better. We are both very much looking forward to being parents, and our baby is going to be born to very excited grandparents, and an Aunt and Uncle who are super excited.
One thing we that we realized is that our baby is also going to have quite the extended family. It is a family that we want our baby to know and experience. In true “2.0 Baby” style, you can expect to see us at BarCamps, Connect, and wherever else we can be with our baby. We’ve got a while, though, since the current due date isn’t until January 18th.
In the meantime, however, we thought it might be a good idea to prepare our baby for this 2.0 world by introducing some of the Aunts and Uncles who will be awaiting his/her arrival. We also thought it might be a good idea to set some ground rules for our baby to follow with his/her Aunts and Uncles. . .
Uncle Jeff is cool now, but he’ll seem even more cool once you are old enough to use Apple products.
You won’t be able to get anything over on Aunt Rocky. She already has six of you.
If you ever need candy, ask Uncle Mike.
If you want to know about Uncle Todd, google him– he’s kind of a big deal.
Uncle Andy is only allowed to watch you before 6pm. No matter what he says, Flask 2.0 is not filled with milk.
Don’t call him Uncle Brad. Call him Uncle Cool.
If Aunt Ines gives you “the look,” RUN.
We’ll try to take enough pictures of you that you should be prepared for Aunt Teresa by the time you meet her.
Uncle Jay was born in the same hospital as you. How cool is that? Also, he can teach you what the “dead man’s hand” is.
Don’t ask Uncle Rob a question, unless you are prepared for a long debate– although, you’ll probably agree with whatever his current assessment is of the Jets.
Aunt Mizzle rocks!
If you ever lose any of your uncles, just look for Aunt Heather and Aunt Ginger, your uncles will be around there, somewhere.
Be careful around Uncle Bill, his wit is razor-sharp.
If the OTHER Uncle Jeff looks depressed, it’s totally normal– he’s a Buffalo sports fan.
If you become a Britney Spears fan, talk to Uncle Drew. He will score some tickets.
If you need a ride anywhere, ask Uncle Ben. His car runs on smiles and rainbows.
Uncle Jovan is a Fluco; therefore, he is awesome.
If you need investing advice, turn to Uncle Bawldguy– he always makes the right call.
If you are ever in doubt as to how to dress, try to dress one level above Uncle Dan. That way, you’re sure to impress.
There is a good chance that, one day, Uncle Greg is going to write a blog post about you. Don’t worry, he still loves you– he just wants to make you a better baby. Also– there will be NO playing of Scrabble for money with Uncle Greg.
Talk to Aunt Sarah, she’ll let you on the moon bounce.
When you want a pony, talk to Aunt Donna and Aunt Candy Lynn, they can handle that.
If Aunt Lani and Uncle Benn ever ask you to contribute, do it. They only ask for the best.
You need good data to make good decisions. See the other Uncle Mike. Also, if you are looking for a party– he’s your man.
Gentle, thoughtful, people are often hard to come by, so spend time with your Uncle Rudy.
If you can train your ears to listen really quickly, you can learn that much more. Listen to Uncle Dustin, that should provide adequate training.
When you want your own website, talk to Uncle Jim.
If you are looking for a good portrait, browse through Aunt Kristal’s flickr stream. You’re probably in there, somewhere.
If you are going to talk about anything serious with Uncle Keith, make sure you do it BEFORE the beer starts flowing. Otherwise, things could get strange.
If you need any really cool, crafty stuff made to make all the other babies jealous, talk to your other Aunt Sarah.
When you are ready to ride the DC Metro, Uncle Matt makes a great riding partner.
I’ll bet that if you ask really nicely, Uncle Brad and Uncle Bobby will live-stream all your birthday parties.
If you want a good google PR, ask your Uncle Gahlord. Also, do whatever he says, he knows how to ski and shoot a gun.
Let your other Uncle Jim show you how to ride a bike.
Don’t ask your Uncle Jeremy for directions– unless it is to a Tech game.
You’ll get to see all your Inman Aunts and Uncles twice a year. They’re good people, and lots of fun.
Your entire RE.net family is filled with really cool, genuine, good people. Your mother and I hope that you will grow to cherish your memories and relationships with them as much as we have.
There is always room for more family
These are just the Aunts and Uncles we could think of. I know that we probably left some people out (completely unintentionally). If you want to volunteer as an Aunt or Uncle, we’d love to have you! Just leave a comment and show our baby some love!
